lost

I have never lived a more heart-renching day then today...

I have never cried so many tears then today

I have never had my heartbroken more then today...

My house is so silent, so dead. I could hear a pin drop for there are no words to explain how everybody feels. How do I explain how I feel personally...well I couldn't even begin to describe how numb my body feels nor how broken my heart seems to be. Saying goodbye to the closet person in your heart for a while, well there is a begininng to why I am dry of happiness. Seeing the people I love the most crying in agonizing fear as I try to get a grip on why my world is turning so rapidly. For, where was God? Where was I?

I'm sorry for never trying to reach deep into your state

I'm sorry for always asking and never giving

I'm sorry for doing the little things you don't approve

I'm sorry for anything bad I did that made me seem so grown up

I'm still your little girl, your baby, I'm not this illusion of maturaity...

That's an illusion for you can see right through me

The one man in my life I look up too for protection, for hope, for words to yeld my sores. You were once lost but then you were found, what has happened? The man who would never hurt you girls, never hurt your boys. I feel lost. For, what I am to believe? I don't want you gone

I never want you to leave

I never want you to feel helpless

Seeing you cry was like watching a dove die

Your bloodshot eyes sent chills through my spin...

What was I too say? I'm sorry?

You'll always be my Daddy and I'll always be your Little Ebby...